• Home
    • About
      • Home
      • About the Site
      • The Authors
      • Terms of Service and Privacy Policy
      • Email me
    • Reviews
      • List of All Reviews
      • Best of Portland by year
        • Reader Survey: Best of Portland Food 2017
        • Best of Portland 2015
      • Steakhouse Roundup
        • Steakhouse Reviews Introduction
        • El Gaucho Steakhouse
        • Morton’s Steakhouse
        • Ringside Steakhouse
        • Ruth’s Chris
        • Steakhouse – Results
      • Product/Business Reviews
        • Retailer Reviews
        • Product Reviews
    • Topics
      • Memorials
      • Food Memories
      • Travel Writing
      • Food Writing
        • Alcohol Related
          • Beer
          • Wine
          • Spirits
        • April Fools Stories For Portland
        • Contests and Competition
      • Authors / Book Reviews
      • Cheese information
      • Interviews: Honest dialog with people in the Portland food industry
      • Recipes
    • Guides
      • Guide to Portland coffee
        • Portland Coffee Guide
        • A Map of our favorite Portland coffeehouses
        • Reader Survey: Best Coffeehouses in Portland 2017
      • Guide to Local Wine Shops
      • Guide to Portland Bakeries
      • Guide to Portland Distilleries
      • Guide to Portland’s Beer Shops
    Portland Food and Drink

    Portland Food and Drink

    Restaurant News and Information For Portland Oregon Area Restaurants and Bars

    • Facebook
    • Instagram
    • Send me email!

    From the New Yorker: Joel Stein – I Will Be Your Server

    By PDX Food Dude Last Update July 30, 2012 1 Comment

    If you are a subscriber to The New Yorker, a spoof on restaurant service by Joel Stein is pretty darn funny. It covers just about every hot button that seems to come up with diners.

    “…I’ll guide you through the process. First of all, we ask a lot of questions designed to make you feel insecure. Is everyone at the table O.K. with feeling insecure?”…


    “…That’s why we go out to eat!” “Great. We specialize in small plates. Have you heard of small plates?” “Are they like plates, but small?”…


    “…When I go over the specials, I’m also going to be using a lot of made-up words. Have you read ‘Finnegans Wake’?” “I don’t know what that is.” “No problem. I have a PhD in comp list. The shankton of wildrange fizzle comes with a side of foraged burrbark….”


    “…The chef would like it if you ate with your left hands, since he is left-handed and that is how he prepares the food….”

    Even if you aren’t a subscriber, you can read a full abstract here.

     

    Related

    Category: Portland Food and Restaurant News and Discussion.

    Previous Post: « Dramatic Reading of Yelp Reviews
    Next Post: Corazon Restaurant Closes Forever »

    Reader Interactions

    Comments

    1. PDX2CDG says

      July 31, 2012 at 4:58 pm

      another lol moment….thanks for sharing!

      Reply

    Leave a Reply Cancel reply

    Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

    This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

    © 2023 · PortlandFoodandDrink.com • See Terms of Service and Privacy Policy