Review: A Private Letter to Two Tarts Bakery

Two Tarts Combo PlateYou two little tarts!

I don’t want to love you, you wicked temptress! You are my Delilah, weakening me with your gooey chocolate chip cookies sprinkled with sea salt; cookies that called me back to the register at the coffee-house, even after I’d sat down with my drink. My femme fatale, how well your alluring treats weaken my resolve to resist, they make love to my cappuccino – buttery, salty, crunchy – I must have one with every cup. You are a siren with your peanut butter delights drizzled with bittersweet chocolate, your cappuccino creams of cinnamon goodness, or your sassy pecan tessies. My diet has been dashed upon the rocks.

However, I must chant a hymn unto you, my Cupid. I love that your little cookies are the perfect size; I can indulge myself without guilt. I am enchanted with every tart. You bewitch me; daily I buy two or three; talismans to seduce an unsuspecting friend.

Now it is time to share our love.

Suddenly, they are everywhere: Foster and Dobbs, Coffee House NW, Zupan’s, City Market, New Seasons… tiny little cookies, that are quite simply the best tarts I’ve had in some time. The brainchild of Elizabeth Beekley and Anna Phelps, Two Tarts Bakery has spread from their original stand at the Portland Farmer’s Market, sending their goodness across the city. Now they have opened a retail store at 2309 NW Kearney.

I love that a salesperson looked at me once and said, “dude… can you imagine getting stoned and eating this entire jar!”, and for a moment, I could.

The tiny cookies are so inconspicuous it’s easy to miss them – I always look for them near the register. It’s worth your time tracking them down, and I promise, when you walk out of the store, you’ll still be thinking about them. Oh, and the extra ones I buy to share? I’m secretly glad when, after walking down those little side streets and back alleys and entering through the basement, I don’t run into anyone I know.

Your thoughts are welcome

  1. Catherine Cole says

    Well said, as always Food Dude! Summer 08 has already been kissed by these two. I can’t pass their booth at the Farmers’ Market without getting two of anything in their case.

  2. says

    Ever since we sampled these delights we have found ourselves over in NW Portland hunting them down, despite the fact that we live on the other side of the river. The Pecan Tessies are sin and my partner has been known to eat the Peanut Butter Creams by the bagful…literally. We couldn’t be more elated at the thought of a retail location. Just when I thought Portland couldn’t get any better…

  3. daniel says

    So so so good. You’ve captured my exact feelings in your letter. And a retail spot right next to Laurelwood? They seem to do everything right.

  4. Tim says

    I second the hope that I won’t see any acquaintances while I have my cookies in hand. Or that if I do, said acquaintances suddenly have gone on a ridiculous diet that certainly does not allow them to share these awesome little morsels with me. It’s a bit of a conundrum though because I love the cookies and want other people to know about them and love them too, I simply don’t want to share mine with them…

  5. Pancy Fants says

    I love these teeny tiny treats! It’s a welcome relief from the American tradition of giant, flavorless baked goods. One of these itty-bitty cookies has more flavor than the entire pastry case at Starbucks.

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